Freudian Projection

Freud wrote extensively on the subject of projection, whereby we attribute parts of our personalities, beliefs or feelings onto another. There are also many theories suggesting reasons why certain people may enter into caring professions; maybe they are unable to care for themselves as well as they really need to so substitute this need into looking after others, or maybe previous relationships of their have ruptured beyond repair so they are searching for substitutes.
 I’ve never believed I fall into any of these categories, at least within the parameters of my career, until this afternoon. And now I have to wonder. Am I taking sufficient care of myself? Am I unconsciously projecting a deep rooted need to be looked after out into the classroom? Evidently, according to Jessie, I am …

So I was about to take the children outside when I saw that Jason was looking rather tearful. I stopped in my tracks and bent down to his height, then asked in my gentlest voice whether everything was ok. He hesitated then nodded, brightened up and ran off to bag the best bike. I straightened, ready to move onto my next task, when three year old Jessie came up behind me. Placing her hands gently on my thigh she said
‘Come on, I help you,’ in her sweet, caring voice, and before I could resist she gently guided me into the ‘teacher’ toilet. She gave a motherly nod then closed the door and left me in privacy.

I was rather bemused but figured I may as well make the most of the situation so flicked the lock and went to the loo, then was washing my hands when I heard someone pulling at the door handle. Pretty confident that it was Jessie I told her to wait, then went to open the door myself, figuring that she would have lost interest and moved on. So I was rather surprised that she was stood there waiting patiently, turning a face full of concern with me as I left the bathroom.

‘Are you better now?’ She asked, and it was only once I had confirmed that I was indeed ‘better’ that she smiled and skipped off, presumably content that she had done her good deed for the day.

And that was when I wondered whether I was projecting a deeper need to be cared for into looking after of my charges. Perhaps it’s about time I started to take more care of myself, as well as prioritising all their needs. But then maybe, sometimes, one’s desire to do a good deed just takes over rational thought. There was, after all, something rather reminiscent in the whole scenario of that crack about the boy scout who insisted on helping the elderly lady across the road, despite her protests to the contrary, then took off and left her stranded on the opposite side of the street to her house. But, at the end of the day, at least they all mean well … !